tanner had been "grounded", for lack of a better word. he'd managed to sneak out of the house last night and spent his time in the far north, trying to remember what it was like to be human. ordering a burger, small talk with passing strangers. he didn't understand how vampires grew to not miss it. he missed a burger being his biggest craving. all other food didn't compare to blood anymore. he missed talking to people without being unable to focus on their heartbeat. but life was no longer that simple. he was controlled by a man who rarely let him know the whys and why nots, or even what his logic was. nevertheless, being locked up all day had proven detrimental to him. he'd been feeding three times a day since he'd been turned. but lock down meant that he wasn't getting anything to eat until his maker decided it so. so it was no surprise that when he'd been told he had a meal on the way, he was more than ready for it. in fact, he was starving. he trully hope that this person was big enough that he could drink and drink without the fear of killing them. he heard the human's heartbeat before he heard him knock, standing up quickly. it took him less then a second to pull the boy into his room, slamming him back against the bedroom door before his fangs protracted. he quickly began to feed on the boy, growing slightly. all the buzzing in his veins just disappeared. after coming to his sense, tanner quickly speed towards the opposite way, curling in on himself. "i-i'm.. i'm sorry. i'm so sorry," he mumbled, upset. he wiped his face wit his shirt, looking anywhere but at the brunette across from him.

some part of tanner was disturbed by the fact that this human seemed to have no reaction to being bit. it was like it was second nature. and by all the marks on his neck, it probably was. but it was hard to care when he was starving for blood and there was a willing participant right in front of him. at lease it was at first before he pulled himself away. tanner didn't like feeding. in fact, he hated it. he always felt like a predator, a murderer. and that was just not something he could live with. still revved up from a blood high, tanner growled loudly before rushing towards the boy, wrapping a hand tightly around his neck as he dragged him up the door. "i am not a pussy! got it?" he threatened. letting the human go after a quick moment, he stared at him intently, shaking his head. "what's wrong with you, huh? do you want to die?" he accused. he ran his finger along the scar on the boys neck, furrowing his eyebrows. this was not normal or safe by any means. what human put themselves in that much constant danger of death.

generally tanner steered away from using his strength on people. he didn't like being undead, so why use his new 'abilities' to his advantage like the monster he had been turned into? this boy's blatant disrespect for his own life made tanner angry. didn't he see how lucky he was? he was alive. he'd get to grow old, get married, and have children. one day he would do the natural thing and die. why rush that? why cut your life short so soon. tanner snapped his fangs at dominic, pressing a hand down hard on his chest. "you spoiled fucking brat. do you even realize how lucky you are?" he seethed. he leaned in close, getting in dominic's face. "you're alive. human. you know what i'd give to be human again? you get an entire fucking life and you're wasting it trying to be killed by a vampire?" tanner could feel himself breathing hard, the adrenaline clearly taking over. two months ago he would've killed dominic in a rage, but instead he just step back, snorting with a smirk. "you're the pussy here," he smirked, shaking his head. "poor little human, life is so fucking hard."

it wasn't fair for tanner to dump his problems onto this perfect stranger. it wasn't like dom was the one who had changed him against his will. he hadn't taken him away from hsi family, his friends. but it had been so long since he'd been in contact with someone his own age, let along someone who he could take to, whether or not they were interested in hearing his story. and he really should not have gotten so violent with him. not only did the boy probably not like it, but it would get him in trouble with benedikte if he saw the small bruises forming on the boys skin where he had held on with his fingers. sighing, tanner looked away as the other spoke. "i don't want to," he mumbled in response, trying to hide how upset he was by the whole ordeal. he hated this more than anything. he hated that regular human food was like eating crackers now. the blood.. it was everything. he had started to compose himself when the smell of fresh blood hit his nose, causing him to perk up. the boy's arm was absolutely drippy, blood coming out fast enough that tanner knew he had cut a vertical line down his wrist. he looked from his face back down to his arm, fangs extended involuntarily. he struggled for a moment, trying to fight the urge, but it proved no use. having no need to actaully bite the boy, he started to suck on his wrist, a soft whimper coming from his throat. once he started he couldn't stop, drinking and drinking and drinking. he had forgotten that there was even a heart beat attached to the blood.

it was lonely in the condo most days. thanks to ben being paranoid, tanner rarely got to see outside the window of his room. he was trapped in a tiny space all day every day. and that only time he got contact with humans was when he was feeding on them. he missed human company, missed the life they brought with them. but this one wasn't like a normal human. tanner coudl tell his light had been put out long ago by something awful. maybe part of him saw that hopelessness that he felt himself in his body now. tanner allowed him to move them towards the bed, finally hearing the slowing heartbeat in his ears. he pulled away, face covered in blood. "shit, shit," he mumbled. there was no way he was going to let this guy's wish for death come true tonight. he'd already killed enough and he felt like shit each time. pushing the boy onto his back softly, tanner leaned over him, biting down into his own wrist. "drink. not a choice," he commanded, pressing his wrist up to the boy's lips.

tanner tried to put himself in this boy's shoes. was it so impossible that he could feel the same way about life as tanner did about being vampire? in that way, he had no right to judge this person for having no regard for their own life. but he was young, and he was cute, and that made it hard for tanner to let it go. he had always been someone who cared about others, even when it wasn't his place to. apparently vampirism had only hightened that instinct. it was obviously that the boy didn't want his blood, but tanner didn't care. he wasn't going to let him die. and the other solution would be him sleeping in tanner's room because there was no way he was going to dump him somewhere half-conscious. but tanner was new to all of this, and when he felt the young male start to stuck lightly at his wrist, he didn't expect the feeling that came with it. there was an odd sense of calm, an eery peace. tanner himself sighed softly, closing his eyes as he reveled in the feel of it. his eyes finally fell down towards the brunette, brushing his hair out of his face with his free hand. tanner knew it was only a matter of time before he'd been good as new again, and leave him to his lonesome once more.

benedikte had told him in the beginning that he needed to stop caring about humans. that they were no longer people with feelings and lives, but a food source. but how could he possibly think of them that way? how could he feed off someone and not wonder about their life. what made this boy so sad? what made him so numb to the world. as far as he knew, there was a slight bit of pain that came with being bitten unless you did it right, and this body had clearly been around the block a few times. tanner watched him turn away and then realize something: this boy was just as lonely as he was. he sighed, looking at the back of his head for a moment. while he was here and sleepy, he mine as well stay, right? tentatively, tanner moved towards the boy, wrapping an arm around his waist before pulling his body into his own. he knew that the coldness of his skin would hardly do anything to help make the boy comfortable, but maybe the gesture would be enough.